Ika was relaxing in the jungle, tired and weary as usual but he realized that he was ultimately in need of a bit of sparring practice. It was at that point when he realized that for some reason, somehow, he had felt a Spiritual Pressure emanating from his basement. It was an annoying one, a nuisance that rang through every fiber of his being. He had flashbacks to punting it across continents, to pummeling it within an inch of it's miserable fucking life! To squeaky breasts.. Wow.. Sometimes life really did get fucking weird these days, but that was secondary to the fact that the psychotic squeaker was in his basement, as though she were paying Ika some kind of rent. Ika's brow furrowed in frustration, and the cigarette that once lingered around his lips would quickly make it's way to the ground for him to stomp out.

As he move downstairs slowly, all he could see radiating from his basement was a rainbow of light, and all he could hear? Was pure and utter fucking madness.

In the sweaty jungles of Bogota, I ended up here because I'd run out of places to go. Most people didn't really tolerate me, and even fewer ignored me. More often than not, I was chased from place to place. Heathens. No one understands art. But here I am in some sweaty nerd's basement. I was listening to Igorrr, whom I hadn't given a fair shake for a long time. To be honest, I missed the beautiful insanity that not a lot of people truly understood. In fact, I was getting so into the erractic screaming that I'd join in, screaming along. Though I wouldn't notice the person entering, seemingly invested in seeing what the fuck I was up to.

Ika's face quickly curled into a disgusted expression as he witnessed the former 3rd seat screaming along with some hobo throat singer in his basement. They were both annoyances and they both needed to leave. Ika Shunpo Punted the man in the ass, launching him 80 yards out of the way and perhaps severely injuring him, and that left him with Saio. A Vizard with the weirdest abilities the world had yet known and perhaps ever would know, and it was at that point that Ika got an idea. He grabbed her by the hair on her head and wrapped it around a chain, much like one would expect from a punching bag and it was at this point he knew what to do. He unloaded a right hand into her ribs and it was met with a satisfying squeak, before her mouth opened and quickly began to play "Eye of the Tiger."

Today was going to be interesting..

Little did I know a certain Mazi would show up and completely flip the situation. A hobo that I didn't even recognized got his shit kicked in. I had to double take. Seriously. When something happens and I'm the one that doesn't see it coming.... What in the actual fuck. ALSO How in the actual fuck did Ika learn how to use my power like this? The punching bag routine isn't funny for meeeeeee. Okay, the first verse and chorus of Eye of the Tiger was kinda funny. I'll admit it. But after that, my hair untied itself, the song stopped, and my body instinctively took an accusative position, pointing at Ika, jaw open wider than any normal human could acheive. "I- You- Uh... Hang on I just remembered." I manually had to reset my body, pulling my arm back to my side.... Then I removed my Apple Airpods (Please sponsor me, Apple.)

"Sorry... I uh. I had my Airpods in." I said this as sounds of violins, screaming, and a lot of strange tableware noises erupted from two little white baubles. Right... I slapped my iPod Shuffle and it stopped playing. iPod Shuffle? In 2019? Yeah, so fucking what? It's the only thing I have that Ika can't ruin. Can't be too careful with malware and.... uh... Okay, the real reason is I'm poor as shit. I blew all the money I had on the Airpods ;w;

But... I know someone who did have money. And I knew just how to get him to share. I'd cringelord the fuck out of him. I tugged at his shirt, looking up at him with the weeaboo-iest eyes I could muster and said "Can I have some money, daddy?" I was either about to die, or about to get enough money for at the very least... lunch.

The girls hair untied itself in a moment and she began to point at Ika in an accusatory manner, her mouth agape as she began to accuse Ika of nothing at all. She mentioned that she had to get rid of her airpods so that she could probably think and hear him, but unfortunately for her all this did was annoy Ika even further. And it was at that point in time that Ika heard the line of the day, the line of the century even! This fucking thing said something so incredibly stupid, Ika couldn't fathom doing anything less than beating it to death with his bare hands. A single bead of sweat rolled down Ika's forehead, and was quickly evaporated from the heat radiating off of it.

Ika picked the girl up by her hair once more, and wound his arm up in a slapping motion. Back and forth, back and forth, at Shunpo speeds. He then proceeded to move his hand over the cartoon cunts face, and smack the ever loving shit out of her. "Please die, please die, oh god please die. Tell me this isn't real.. you're not real.. Oh god.. why me.."

The moment the word 'daddy' escaped my lips, I saw Ika's face twist and contort, then finally collapse in on itself. This was not the reaction I wanted out of him. I'd officially broken Ika, I could tell, because he could say nothing. All I heard was the sound of "WWRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!" followed by the sound of my neck rubberbanding back and forth, making hilarious *boing* noises each time my neck hit the extent of the bend before being hit the other way. When it was finally over, my head was on the floor about 50 feet away, attached to my body by a fleshy snake of a neck. "Hang on a second." I grabbed a section of my neck, roping and winding it up like one would an extension cord, considering it was unfortunate that I had to resort to this. A few minutes later I tossed the coil into the air, retracting the rest of my neck into my body. "Yeah don't ask. I'm pretty sure my mother was either an anaconda or a giraffe."

I gave Ika a solid look, then prodded him to make sure that he was okay... Though I wasn't sure if he'd ever be okay after that. "I do actually need some money though... That wasn't a joke."

So the girl seemed to realize she had made a bit of a mistake, presumably after Ika's mind had visibly exploded she took the hint. This was of course followed by the sound of Ika smacking the absolute shit out of her, and he would be lying if he said the rubber-band feel and the boing sounds weren't half the appeal to continuing this full frontal assault. When Ika finished, Saio's neck looked like an Anaconda and her head was about fifty feet in the opposite direction, his only regret was that he hadn't severed it. The girl seemed to wind her neck up like an extension cord and Ika watched in pure shock and awe as it recoiled, like one of those fucking bouncy coils. "What in the fuck are you.."

Ika shook his head, mystified by the dumb-founding horse-shit he had just paid witness to. His eyes and mouth were both agape, and as she mentioned needing money once again a trickle of sweat slowly worked it's way down his head, turning into some weird red anger sign that was awkwardly drawn on yet above his forehead. This was Anime now boys. "I will pay you any amount of money.. to get the FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE."