You know, now that I thought about it.... the way she dealt with me... I got the feeling that maybe she really did want some sort of companionship at some point. Maybe, somewhere in there, she still did. The way she acted, countless others before me had used her and not actually been interested in being around her for... well, being herself. Seemed maybe too many people disappointed her, so she stopped trying to care. And yet, as I spoke to her, her expression changed from one of disdain to interest. At least I think I saw that... I might have imagined it. It may not have been my imagination after all, as when I began to leave her be, she stopped me. She did so in way that felt very dominating, and oddly enough, I didn't mind. It wasn't an oppressive feeling so much as it felt like she was being playful since her interest was piqued.
Though the next set of events was not what I was expecting. As her voice went from exasperated, to astonished, to even looser tones, she adjusted her resting body, giving me just enough space to sit. She half-offered, half-expected me to sit with her, stating she might not be welcome company. She also mentioned ruining her nap, which I'd been afraid of shortly after I arrived... though she didn't seem so upset about that. She did seem curious about what I talked about, who I was, what I could be.
I'll admit I wasn't quite comfortable being that close to her, at least quite yet. When I'd said I wanted to be closer, this wasn't what I meant. But knowing the aura she put off, who she was the child of, and a few other things that I couldn't quite place... I decided it best not to tell her any of that. Denying her after making her feel like someone was generally interested in her would probably set off a chain of events that I didn't want to live through. So I made my way over to her, sitting, practically pressed up against her leg considering how little space there was. And though it was mostly an afterthought, the sensation of searing pain made its way down my back. There's no real way I could have stifled my reaction, to shake a bit, buckling a little under the shock. For her sake, and potentially my own, I tried to deal with it. "When I say energies.... I have no idea what they're actually called. My energy, yours, the energy around us in the atmosphere. The energy that we put off when we fight.... I'm still new to most of this. Up until.... say a week ago, I didn't know I carried an Asauchi. I didn't know I could walk on air. I didn't know what a shinigami or a spirit were. To my knowledge at the time, I was an extremely long-lived human. It's only through the people I've met that I've learned how oblivious I've been. And if the accent annoys ye that much, I can try to speak proper english... I grew up in Scotland, by the way." I couldn't quite make eye contact with her. It was difficult to keep myself upright, seeing as if I got any closer to her, it felt like I'd burn alive.
I figured even after that explanation, something personal to her, to explain why I couldn't seem to resist the pain that came seemingly from nowhere. "And with you, right now, I feel immense pain. Your natural energy... I take it your powers are fire. I've slowly been able to deduce things like how people are, to what they do because of things. I feel like if I keep trying, I can get better at that... but putting that aside. It does hurt a lot to be this close to you, but I figured it worth it to bear it. I'm tired of not exploring who I am because I'm afraid to feel pain. Being around those Hollows, around you, your father... anyone that needs to fight... It'll hurt regardless. But I can't live a normal life anymore. It's long past that. And I certainly don't want to be alone. That hurts even more than being as close to you as I am right now."